Hardest Deployment Week

This week has certainly been the hardest of the deployment. I was spoiled with out communication, but it has been over a week since I heard from AJ. ( Yes I am spoiled, and I know that several others have gone much longer.) But, when you start a deployment with daily or several times a day communication, going to nothing is a little heartbreaking and nerve wrecking. I started the deployment by not listening to the news, etc... but yesterday I made the mistake of having it on. It started with IEDs killed 7 and names being released pending family notification. I immediately started thinking that I had no idea what part of Afghanistan AJ was in, or what he was doing. This week, I have woken up to horrible dreams and even found myself slowly creeping up to my house when getting back from errands. Just in case, someone was waiting to notify me. I relieved the horror of past deployments and constantly wondering if that noise I heard outside, was a knock on my door. I have had zero motivation this week. I did make a list, and made sure I started crossing things off yesterday.

I have been up and motivated this morning. Still praying for that phone call. =)