Post Deployment Adjustments

I can not believe that AJ has been home for over a month now. It has been so nice to reconnect, get to know each other again, and fall in love all over again. I forgot how much I really really did miss having him around. I have even trained him to get up with G in the middle of the night. =)

The adjustment after a deployment can be really really hard. You both are used to being your own person, and now all of a sudden you have to mesh back together. I am thankful that this transition has gone pretty well. We have had our bumps, but a lot more smooth sailing days. He is getting ready to start his last two weeks of leave before he heads back to his civilian job. That will mean working at night, sleeping during the day, and working weekends. I am trying to soak up every minute of the evenings and weekends with him. Part of me is ready for him to be back to work, as I can get back into my school routine. Right now I find myself not wanting to spend time on homework in the evenings, because I'd rather be sitting around the fire drinking a cocktail with my love.

Speaking of school, I am in the middle of my second semester of grad school through the virtual academic center at the University of Southern California ! Midterm papers will be done over the next couple of weeks. I am really enjoying both of my classes! I just filled out my clinical paperwork, and will start with a placement in January. Exciting!

Well, we are off to church. Hubby is sleeping on the couch, Brady is playing playstation, and G is unloading the entertainment center. Time to kick everyone in high gear. =)

Adjusting After Deployment

We have really been enjoying our time together. Adjusting after a deployment is always hard. The kids are taking it in stride. Aj and I are enjoying getting to know each other again. With that comes with having to learn how to deal with those little things that get under our skin, my carefree attitude versus my husband's analness, and learning to be a good stay at home wife. When Aj left I was balancing my real estate career and the family. It still got me out several days a week. When he got activated we made the decision to lessen my load, and I would stay home. (Then I needed to be challenged and added grad school to my plate.) It is much different being a housewife when AJ is home versus gone. I feel like I need to show him accomplished something. I have to shower and keep the house picked up. I feel like I should have a dinner plan in mind other then deployment hot dogs. Sometimes I want to stand at the door and scream " take me with you !" Today I am stuck home while my car gets worked on and AJ has a night out planned with his police friends. It is going to be a long day for me. Then there are most days that I love teaching our little monkey and being here when the boys walk in the door.
We are taking one last trip to our Michigan house this weekend. It has sold so it will be bittersweet. I am sure we will all shed some tears as we pull away. Aj and I have so many memories there. It was our first vacation as kids together. I used to sneak down to his room ( don't tell my mom). I brought Keegan there to meet his great-grandparents when he was a few months old. We spent many summers there with my Mamaw passing time while Aj was deployed or training. We celebrated homecomings there, conceived Brayden there, watched Mamaw fight her cancer there, told the boys we would be a family of 5 there, and told the boys AJ was deploying last year there. We learned about wine and that the lake can cure anything. It is my favorite place in the whole world and I am sad that the last piece of my Mamaw will be gone. I know she is with me, but I still feel her in the house. Say a prayer the weekend is peaceful and recharging for us all.

Here are a few pics from our week.

Deployment Skype Date

We were so fortunate to get a Skype date with AJ today. Graycen just squealed with excitement when he saw him. He kept saying "Hi, Hi, Hi,". It was so fun! I didn't expect Graycen to react that way, but he just couldn't get enough of Dada. The boys needed it to, as they have been at each other the past few weeks. A phone call and a Skype date sure helps!

Hardest Deployment Week

This week has certainly been the hardest of the deployment. I was spoiled with out communication, but it has been over a week since I heard from AJ. ( Yes I am spoiled, and I know that several others have gone much longer.) But, when you start a deployment with daily or several times a day communication, going to nothing is a little heartbreaking and nerve wrecking. I started the deployment by not listening to the news, etc... but yesterday I made the mistake of having it on. It started with IEDs killed 7 and names being released pending family notification. I immediately started thinking that I had no idea what part of Afghanistan AJ was in, or what he was doing. This week, I have woken up to horrible dreams and even found myself slowly creeping up to my house when getting back from errands. Just in case, someone was waiting to notify me. I relieved the horror of past deployments and constantly wondering if that noise I heard outside, was a knock on my door. I have had zero motivation this week. I did make a list, and made sure I started crossing things off yesterday.

I have been up and motivated this morning. Still praying for that phone call. =)

Moving Along

I honestly can't tell you where the week went. I have had a sick baby all week and feel like I have just been doing the motions throughout the day. Aj is out on a mission. It always makes things worse knowing he is away from the safety from his home. There was a point yesterday I packed the big boys up, dropped them off at the pool, and just drove with G. I couldn't take the constant crying and no napping. That would have been a day I would have given anything for AJ to walk through the door and just take over. Soon... We did book our fall mexico trip. We decided to go with Secrets Resorts and their new resort opening in August. I really couldn't stand paying good money without a pool on the beach and ocean views . I can look at green all day everyday. ;) We are looking forward to the 80 degrees coming this weekend. I've had enough of the 100+ days.

Standing Still

I have been missing my husband the past few days a bit more then usual. I think a lot of it stems from a needy 15 month old, who won't let me out of his sight. It does become exhausting. I am ready for someone else to be his favorite and more then a minute to skip off to the bathroom. I am seeing the light at the end, but now it isn't moving fast enough. Praying for patience this week.

My midterm was sent off... huge relief. Now I have another paper to start, and a week of homework to get caught up on as I put it all of working on the paper. My reward is the Dirty Girl this weekend in Chicago with my Marine gals and an IKEA and Cheesecake Factory treat. Ready set...

This and That

This week has gotten away from me. I'm in the middle of my midterm paper. 3 out of 4 of us are sick. But, there is no time to be sick. Keeg is at a basketball camp this week and this mom doesn't have back up. I did have someone bring is dinner tonight and I hired a cleaning lady yesterday. I felt a little bit like a princess working on homework and having three people run around and scrub. Totally worth the money and I have them set up mid month from now on. I did get to talk to AJ on Skype. He called when I was getting my haircut and dried. I opted for leaving with wet hair and covered in hair to talk to him. He hasn't seen G walk yet, so I held the phone up so he could see him. What a nice treat for him! If everything goes as planned I am starting to see the end in site. Everything is on code when we talk , so not sure if I've figured it out 100% but think I have I pretty good idea when he should return . Never realize how much you appreciate asking questions and getting a solid answer until they go overseas. ;)

Plugging Away

This week has completely gotten away from me. I can't honestly tell you what day of the week it is. Brady has been at Bible School and Keegan has been everywhere. He turned 13 this week. Crazy to think he is a teenager and all that will come in the next few years. G started walking today! Finally! We were at the doctors office getting his ears checked and I guess he decided it was time. He was showing off for all the people in the waiting room and then walked around the house. He looks like ET when he walks. I had a sad moment realizing he is a big boy now. No more little baby. We are all just plugging away, and rumor is the light isn't to far away from the end of this long year. It does make me happy to think that in a few months this could all behind us. It seems a little unreal, because deployments never get cut short. So, I will believe it when I see it. Other then that, school is going great. I got an A on my first paper and a B on my second. I was a bit hard on myself with the B after starting with an A, but I convinced myself it was still good. I am hitting bed a bit early tonight. Not getting enough sleep for sure.

The Light

Have you ever had one of those moments that God is speaking directly to you at church ? Today I had one of those moments. I have been just plain tired. Tired of this deployment, tired of taking care of everyone, and just tired of doing everything on my own. Today I was reminded that I need to be the light for all those people. God gave me the light and I can not cover it. This song touched me.
I've been holding on
I've been holding on
All that is inside me
Screams to come back home

If you feel lost
If you feel lost
Sing along
If you feel tired
If you feel tired
Sing along

If you feel lost and tired
This is your song

I've been broken down
I've been broken down
I ain't giving up
Love will come back around

Shine Your light
Shine it down on us
Let Your rescue come for us
We long to love

Shine Your light
Shine it down on us
Let Your rescue come for us now

And if you feel lost, sing along
And if you feel tired, sing along

Oh my God
Shine Your light on us
That we might live

Keeg Is Home

My friend Shannon and I headed to Indiana last night and stayed in a hotel. We got in pretty late so the highlight of our night was a quick trip to Meijers and Skinny Girl Piña Colada(fab!). I slept awesome and was still up on G time. G is working on some more teeth ( the kid has 11) and was up a couple of times. Ugh!
Keeg had a blast. He said he didn't miss me, but I know he did. The first words out of my soon to be 13 year old's mouth was, " all the girls hit on me". He only showered 2 times but assured me he used deodorant and brushed his teeth most of the time. He was not impressed with MREs and was a leader the whole week. ( As if I expected anything else). ;)
We made it safely to my friends driveway when we heard a pop. Yep, AJ's car now had a flat! Both cars in 2 weeks. Luckily her husband is a fireman and was in the area. We finally got the refi done. Not before they got a big piece of my mind. It caused so much unnecessary stress if they would have had an ounce of client care. I was able to take my interest rate down a percentage, two months no payments (hello Mexico savings), and had no fees. So, I know it was worth my energy. Did I mention the 100.00 they gave me too? Oh well.. I'll take it! I did get my first grad school paper back and I got a fat A! I was so nervous! Just the reassurance I needed to keep on moving!

10 minutes into the ride!

Relaxing at home!

I found this on the fridge. I thought it was sweet!

The local fire department came to my rescue!

Deployment Law of Attraction

Yesterday before 8:30 in the morning I had a toilet over flow, water all over my laundry room and garage, and a very sad boy. It is true that when your husband hits overseas, everything seems to break. Thankfully my Dad was able to help because I had class!
I did get to chat with AJ via iMessage . He is doing good. Sounds as if he will be strapped to his desk most of the deployment. I know it bothers him, but I think he is ok with it because he knows it makes me happy.

Words To Remember

"Our children won't remember every paper we forgot to sign, or the week we fed them hot dogs for seven straight days.... What they will remember is how we prayed with them and listened to their dreams and fears." From Out of The Spin Cycle by Jen Hatmaker.

Moving Along

It's been a long 24 hours. No word from AJ. I have done surprisingly well, but I have been spoiled by a piece of communication everyday. I hear things are nuts there and I am sure AJ is having to deal with a lot getting everyone settled.
Graycen has been sleeping all night for a week! He has been a bear the past few days. I realized yesterday, tooth 11 is in!

Week 1

One week down! It has been chaotic and my stress level was very high. AJ made it safe and we have been able to communicate in some form everyday. The boys have been acting out and not listening. 3 more days of school, then they are all home ! I am not going to lie I am excited about the more lazy days of summer and having more hands for G.
G has been sleeping awesome. I have been letting him fall asleep on his own for naps and night. He has been sleeping 10 hours at night. Still up between 5:30 and 6! It is a good thing I am a morning person.
The boys have started baseball. I am headed to sit in this glorious 90 degree weather!
School is going good. I have finished my first paper. It has definitely been a change of pace and my house reflects that.
We went to our new church again this week and I left feeling amazing. I really think God led us there for a reason. It is so fun to have a group of friends to go with and talk about things with!

Day 4

See You Later Video

Off US Soil

AJ is finally out of country. They had mechanical problems in Alaska and were there longer then intended. It was horrible to hear it was the last text 5 times. I am not sure I believed him when he really said bye. I cried on and off last night and this morning. After some reminders, I have put my big girl pants on and I have to keep growing during this time.

First Haircut - Deployment Day 1

It Begins

Today has been an emotional day. AJ is making progress to head overseas. I am relieved it is finally here, but the worry begins. Thank you for the notes, E-mails, and texts the past few days. It means a lot!