I heard today of another beautiful former military couple, splitting. It just breaks my heart. After 15 years of this life, we have seen so many of our friends separate. We all have this picture in our heads of how a reunion and homecoming should be. Our heads are filled with how our world will be perfect when our military loved one comes home. The reality is that it takes work. Lots and lots of work.( Even years after the deployment or separation. )You have to find ways to grow not only as a couple, but as an individual. You have to find ways to be creative and stay in love after months and months apart. After the service member leaves the service, feelings of loss and guilt often consume the service member. They see their buddies still coming and going to war, and for whatever reason they left that life behind.
If you are having readjustment issues, even years later. Don't hesitate to call your deployment buddies. You will be surprised how many of them are going through the same things you are (even years later). Get professional help! There was a year that AJ and I were either at the priest or a counselor. We were not willing to give up on our marriage. Remember, marriage is not easy. Military marriages are even harder. Remember the reason you fell in love. I pray that getting my masters degree will open up opportunities to work with other military families.
Saturday 6
2 days ago
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Yes, this is very sad. I've also seen many many military marriages crumble too often. It is definitely work, even more so as military members, but it's worth it!
ReplyDeleteI am also a firm believer in reading books, and it doesn't mean you have to agree with them all. Just keep on growing and fixing yourself and your spouse more often than not will follow suite :)